Quotes

This is just a bunch of quotes. I add to this list when I encounter new quotes or old ones pop into my head.

“Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.” – Monty Python and the Holy Grail

“She turned me into a newt!” – Monty Python and the Holy Grail

“Come out to the coast, we’ll get together, have a few laughs …” – Die Hard

“All right, listen up guys. ‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, except … the four assholes coming in the rear in standard two-by-two cover formation.” – Die Hard

“‘‘And when Alexander saw the breadth of his domain, he wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer’. Benefits of a classical education.” – Die Hard

“Hans, bubby, I’m your white knight.” – Die Hard

“This is agent Johnson. No, the other one.” – Die Hard

“First rule in government spending: why build one when you can have two at twice the price?” – Contact

“That’ll do, pig. That’ll do.” – Babe

“Yes, I’m a Mormon. That’s why I just smoked a pack of Newports and drank three vodka tonics.” – The Long Kiss Goodnight

“You’d better take a good look because I’m getting two things: Pissed off and curious.” – The Insider

“The name’s Francis Sawyer. But everybody calls me Psycho. Anyone calls me Francis, and I’ll kill you.” – Stripes

“Listen! You smell something?” – Ghostbusters

“Many Shuvs and Zools knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!” – Ghostbusters

“Oh, you think darkness is your ally. But you merely adopted the dark; I was born in it, molded by it.” – The Dark Knight Rises

“And I say, Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know? And he says, Oh, there won’t be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed you will receive total consciousness. So I got that goin’ for me, which is nice.” – Caddyshack

“I’m your Huckleberry” – Tombstone

“Why, Johnny Tyler! Where’re you going with that shotgun?” – Tombstone

“Well, would you like to know what you’d be without us, the good ol’ U.S. of A. to protect you? I’ll tell you. The smallest fucking province in the Russian Empire, that’s what. So don’t call me stupid, lady. Just thank me!” – A Fish Called Wanda

“Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not every man for himself. And the London Underground is not a political movement.” – A Fish Called Wanda

“Alright, you primitive screwheads, listen up: THIS… is my BOOM STICK!” – Army of Darkness

“I’d love to stay and chat but I’m having an old friend for dinner.” – The Silence of the Lambs

“Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.” – Fight Club

“Be careful what you shoot at. Most things in here don’t react too well to bullets.” – The Hunt for Red October

“It vexes me. I’m terribly vexed.” – Gladiator

“My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife … And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.” – Gladiator

“You trying to say Jesus Christ can’t hit a curve ball?” – Major League

“Lonestar! At last we meet for the first time for the last time!” – Spaceballs

“You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.” – “The Princess Bride

“I just hate you and I hate your ass face.” – Waiting for Guffman

“And I guess that was your accomplice in the wood chipper.” – Fargo

“Nobody’s looking for a puppeteer in today’s wintry economic climate.” – Being John Malkovich

“I’ve been very lonely in my isolated tower of indecipherable speech.” – Being John Malkovich

“I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I’m all out of bubblegum.” – They Live

“Uh, he’s from space, he came here to steal a necklace from a wizard.” – Avengers: Infinity War

“Ray, people will come Ray. They’ll come to Iowa for reasons they can’t even fathom. They’ll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they’re doing it. They’ll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for the past. Of course, we won’t mind if you look around, you’ll say. It’s only $20 per person. They’ll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and peace they lack. And they’ll walk out to the bleachers; sit in shirtsleeves on a perfect afternoon. They’ll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the baselines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they’ll watch the game and it’ll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they’ll have to brush them away from their faces. People will come, Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt, and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it’s a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh … people will come, Ray. People will most definitely come.” – Field of Dreams

“You see, that’s the kind of crap people always try to lay on me. It’s not my fault you wouldn’t play catch with your father.” – Field of Dreams

“Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here! This is the War Room!” – Dr. Strangelove

“You’re gonna need a bigger boat.” – Jaws

“But in the Latin alphabet, Jehovah begins with an I.” – Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

“These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.” – Star Wars

“A Jedi Knight? I’m out of it for a little while, and everyone gets delusions of grandeur!” – Return of the Jedi

“Baby, you are gonna miss that plane.” – Before Sunset

“The U.S. does not negotiate with terrorists, but … we do negotiate with homies.” – Long Shot

“Houston, be advised: Rich Purnell is a steely-eyed missile man.” – The Martian